Saturday, March 30, 2013

Week 5 Day 1....Progress it's all about the progress...

Well it's the start of week five (yesterday officially) I started out when I started this blog weighing 323.4 pounds yesterday I weighed in at 306 pounds that is a total of 17.4 pounds lost since I started this blog about 4 weeks ago, and 19 pounds from my highest weight! I re did my pictures from my first weigh in and yesterday's weigh in for a little comparison to see if I could tell the difference visually and I can see some change of course not that much but my stomach is definitely NOT as bloated I attribute that to not drinking soda's for sure.
I did redid my measurements I lose 1 inch from around my neck, 4 inches from my waste, 1 and a half from my hips. 
So those are the numbers I'm pretty proud of them honestly! I get super excited about thinking about what the future holds as far as weight loss goes! I have checked off more stuff from my to do list: Upper GI test done and over with everything was lovely from that aside from my reflux which I knew all about. Blood work all done, and my Nutrition class has been taken along with meeting about behavior changes got told to mourn the food that we wouldn't be able to eat anymore I don't know about mourning food suppose it makes some sense but I've already accepted the fact that there are just some things that aren't going in my mouth ever again and that is alright! Next Thursday I go see my doctor here in Sumter who will do my weigh in one month down two more to go. Then after that I have to go to Columbia by 11AM for my Relaxation class and my Nutrition test then I have my Psychological Evaluation and I will have completed a whole lot of my classes and test then it will just become a waiting game to finish up the other two weigh ins so that I can meet with my surgeon an submit all the paperwork to Tri Care to have them hopefully approve my surgery I don't see why they wouldn't. So that's about all that has been going on here not too much to talk about my Father in law is down for the week so we are going to enjoy our Spring Break! I'll re update my pictures after week 8!  Hopefully by then I will have left the 300's far far behind me! :-) Hope you all have a beautiful and blessed Easter remember just like Christmas Jesus is the reason for the season!

Friday, March 22, 2013

Week 4 Day 1......Staying Focused...Staying Strong...Getting Stronger...

Good morning friends! I hope this morning finds you all doing really well! As always it's Friday and I have my weigh in done and put into my myfitnesspal account. You know I never did say why I did start on a Friday with my weight-loss did I...I picked it cause Monday seemed too cliche how many people always say oh I'll start my diet on Monday?? I've even said that as well because it was my excuse to eat however I felt all weekend long before Monday and when Monday comes we use the excuse of OH MONDAY!!! It's just too stressful I can't start a diet now and it just get's put off and put off and forgotten all about till you've gained another 10 or 20 pounds true story promise you lol! So this week I have lost a total of 4 pounds YAY me doing happy dance!!! I'm a grand total of 17 pounds down from my highest weight of 325 pounds and down a total of 15 pounds from when I started my account on myfitnesspal. Next week I'll update my pictures along with my weigh in and my measurements too! I am happy to report that I have been able to increase my water intake thanks to the lovely drops I have found that adds flavor to my water which I have to say I believe the water is helping aid my weightloss tremendously because I hardly ever drank anything I think most days I might have taken in 20-40 ounces of some form of fluids mostly unhealthy like sodas and junk. But these days I take in at least a 100 ounces of water a day! I'm hoping maybe this will help with my dry skin too I have ashy legs yes white people get ashy too don't act surprised! :-) Anyway this blog is going to have some extras in it as I had my first appointment at the weight loss clinic that will be handling my surgery which is looking to be sometime around the end of June first part of July! My first appointment was great! Saw the nurse practitioner and talked extensively about the surgery and health issues she was very nice they all were! I was relieved that it was easy to find and get to cause I was nervous about going somewhere I had never been before so my anxiety was high yesterday morning till I got there! I have most of my preop appts all sat up: Tuesday I go back to Columbia for my Upper GI test at 9AM, Thuresday I go back to Columbia for my one Nutrtion class and all my blood work (must pack an Atkins bar because I'm not allowed to eat before my blood work ekk), then on April 4th I have my weigh in here in Sumter in the morning and then in the afternoon I have to be in Columbia at 2PM for my Psychological Evaluation. I will also while at my weigh in appt get my doctor to set up my appointment for my Echocardiogram that I have to have done before I can be cleared for surgery. Then I'll just be left with 2 more weigh ins then they will set me up to meet with my surgeon Dr. Prickette and he will help me decide which surgery is best for me which we all know it's going to be the gastric bypass as I refuse to do lapban and Tri Care does not pay for the Sleeve so this will be a no brainer part. After he agrees that I am a good candidate for the surgery which I know that I will be paperwork is submitted to Tri Care and they will approve it and then we'll pick a date for my surgery the waiting part for the next two months will be the hard part for me I am so ready to get to the surgery so I can begin this next part of my life I am looking forward to my 40th birthday next year and ready to see what I will be doing at that point I am ready to be free from all this weight and not feel like some social reject and feel good physical, and emotionally and to be able to live my life to the fullest and not miss out on everything anymore! 
So here is to new beginnings as I begin down this road to a new and improved life for me and my family because not only will I benefit from this but they will to because they will have someone who can do more and feel like doing more! They will have someone who isn't hiding behind her weight someone who will get out there and live an active life and enjoy it with them instead of someone who shrinks back in the shadows most days...I am so excited and happy these days!! Well y'all take care till next blog!
<3 Me

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Pick Your Poison..What's Your Drug of Choice...

This is something I know a lot of people are on the fence about and that is can food be addictive! Anyone of my friends who are pleasantly plump, overweight, fluffy or any other descriptive word you can use to define someone who needs to lose weight can most assuredly tell you that yes people can be addicted to food. It's been my drug of choice. I use to boast about being able to put down cigarets anytime I wanted to because I don't have one of them there addictive personalities but the truth of the matter is I do indeed have an addictive personality just the one thing that was and is hard for me to give up is the stuff that is ultimately going to lead to my demise! I love food and it loves me because it chooses to hang around on my body long after I have digested it. Before I go further with my blog let me define addiction for those who are reading this thinking are you kidding me really??


The fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity.

Food indeed is a substance, eating is eh I guess an activity I mean your actively putting food in your mouth. Over the last three weeks I have kicked my soda habit I am proud of that. I have stuck to mostly healthier choices I have had my few indiscretions here and there but nothing that was too bad that it sat me way back in my weight loss.  Some people say all things in moderation when it comes to food...but would you say that to a drug addict? Would you say that to a recovering alcoholic? No you wouldn't assure your friend who use to do drugs that hey if you do it in moderation it's all good ... it's not all good! This is my struggle with the idea of moderation there are just some foods to most of us that would ultimately put us on a downward binge eating episode I know it and most of who are fluffy know it. It triggers that happy feel good feeling! Some overeat for many different reason some are just stuffing their faces in order to stifle emotions, some eat anytime rain or shine no matter what's going on, stress eating, eating from boredom and so on and so forth. You know it's hard to get to the point where you are sick of food or other substances controlling your life it's hard to commit to changing your whole life. No one knows how many times I have thought about going through with this surgery to help me lose the weight I need to lose but only dismiss the thought because I didn't think I could make that commitment to myself to be that careful to be that thoughtful in my planning and thinking and doing. And here I am now months away from taking that plunge to go through with it and I'm not scared even, not worried I'm actually excited and I'm kicking myself in the behind cause I should have done this and made this choice years ago, but who knows maybe I wasn't strong enough years ago still feel like I have wasted so much of my life at times when your on the verge of your 40's you look and see how much of your life you have lived being stuck in a body that has managed to hold you back...but then you think again...maybe it just wasn't the right time then maybe you had to do this and that and come this far just to get to where your going. (Sorry if I'm rambling I tend to do that late at night with my random ADD like thoughts)  However mulling all this over tonight thinking about how food has been like a drug to feels pretty good to be kicking the habit..the bad habits and replacing them with better ones, ones that will improve my life and lengthen my life. Ones that will allow me to be the mother, wife, friend, and every other hat I wear that I want to be. Maybe one day I wont feel so judged when people see me I think that's the worst experience to date is just people looking at you and judging the person they see and not the person you truly are. Thursday is fast approaching I have my first appointment with the weight loss center that I will be going through for my surgery I'm excited and I am truly happy and at peace with my choice to follow through, I know I wouldn't have that peace if it weren't for having God in my life and an awesome support system of wonderful friends that he blessed me with. I'll be 39 this year..hopefully I'll bring in my 40th birthday a whole new woman maybe I'll be half the woman I currently am (Physically speaking I'm okay with who I am inside ;-) ) so the last oh almost 40 years I have hid comfortably or uncomfortably behind my walls that I built up myself...lets see what the next 40 is going to be like...I intend on living each and every moment to it's fullest and doing exactly what God would have me to do and I plan on living a little for a change ;-) It's going to be great! Thanks for reading my mindless rambling but most of all th ank you for even caring to read it! <3 from me! 

Friday, March 15, 2013

Week 3 Day 1 Downward and Onward

Good morning friends!!! Well today is Day 1 of Week 3 I had my weigh in today and though it was not the 9.8 lbs that it was last Friday I still lost and actually I found this neat little graphic today so I wont say I lost anymore because I have no intentions of finding it again I have gotten rid of some weight not as much as last week but still some getting rid of is better than no getting rid of right? So I am down 1.6 pounds which makes me down a total of 11.4 pounds kissed goodbye forever and ever Amen! I am down to 312 pounds and my goal for my next weigh in at my doctors has been met as of last week so anything from here till April 4th is just extra bonus pounds! I have my first appointment in Columbia with the lovely people who will be doing my Gastric Bypass this summer I'm so looking forward to getting this aspect started and going I'll have my nutrtion classes(meetings), my psychologist meeting and whatever else I have to get done before I can have my surgery I am so excited! I am looking forward to this whole process and I am so thankful that I have a few dear friends who have done this before me who are here for me to talk to when I need advise or to encourage me when I need encouragement. I'm so looking forward to the new and improved Lori, not that the current Lori isn't pretty fabulous because I am ha ha! Well I have stuff to get done so I'll talk to y'all next week have a blessed weekend!!
<3 Me

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Just Another Pretty Face

Well this weekend I went home for a visit and honestly I didn't make all the right choices food wise but I'll live and dust it off and keep on going! But that's not what this blog is about just was being honest with myself and my friends who read this! 
You know as a big person as someone who has been "fat" all her life you know the worst comment someone can ever make to an obese woman? Oh you have such a pretty face you'd be gorgeous, pretty, beautiful if you just lost weight! Hello umm that's a back handed compliment in my most honest of opinions! I'm beautiful just the way I am God made me I have a good heart, I love people who love me and treat me right. I give of myself and I care. How dare some people just make those random comments. I guess some feel like it's encouragement but it's not trust me it isn't! So if you ever find yourself getting ready to give that "compliment" to someone who is overweight please take it from me and think again before the words escape your lips! 
In other bits of weight related news, don't you just dislike it when you are around someone who can't do anything but talk about how much weight they have lost? Really I'm glad for anyone who has lost weight be it on their own or with the help of weight loss surgery but really is that all you can talk about? It just feels like someone is trying to rub it in your face! Don't get me wrong I'm happy for the friend in question good for her but there is more to life than that! Maybe I'm making a mountain out of a molehill who knows! 
But I did have a blast with my friends got to hear some good music and looking forward to the Singer Songwriter show even if it isn't till next January but oh well by then I will be a different girl and will have lost a pretty decent amount of weight! And I think that will call for a super cute new outfit for the occasion! Well I'm rambling now so I'm going to say Adios for tonight and go nighty night! Y'all take care! <3 from Me to you!   

Friday, March 8, 2013

Week 2 Day 1 ....Onward...

Good morning friends!! Well today is day one of week 2 I weighed in at 313.6 I started out at 323.4 which puts me at a 9.8 weight loss for the week! Holy cow if only every week could be like that but I know it's just mostly fluid retention that I have lost! No sodas for one week and no coffee for four days. Acid Reflux is a tad bit better than it was! I have been logging my food and most of my exersise and trying to make sure I get my water in I'm getting better with my water! I know that makes a difference! I haven't indulged in any pasta, white bread or potatoes though so yay me! And I haven't fried anything! I love all of those things lol staying strong and keeping going forward! Don't really have much to blog about just wanted to do a quick weigh in up date for those who read my blog! :-) Have a blessed weekend!

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Day 1 of Week 1 Headed Towards The New Me

  Good morning friends!! Well yesterday started off my weight management for me! I have said goodbye to all my favorites it's like a process I swear to you. Being someone who loves food I think we all morn our favorite foods like an addict when they are trying to get clean from alcohol or drugs. Food has always been my drug of choice. I can't honestly tell you what it feels like to be a healthy weight! I promise I probably weighed 100 pounds at age 5 if I could find my Kindergarten picture I'd scan it in and show it to you all! Over to the left of the screen you see my most recent pictures taken the day before I started my weight management! I weighed in at 323.4 pounds (not the 
highest I have ever been 325 is that number but this is the biggest I will ever be again do you know how refreshing that thought is how happy it makes me?)! My measurements were as follows: 
Neck 17.5 on 03/01/13
Waist 52 on 03/01/13
Hips 59.5 on 03/01/13
Arms 19.0 on 03/01/13
Chest 57.0 on 03/01/13 
 Yep that's a whole lot of woman right there! Oh and excuse the back view I was trying to be silly with my 15 year old when she took it! I took the pictures in my Biggest Loser 5K t-shirt because of a few reason one is serves

for inspiration for me reminding me of what I can accomplish and what I have accomplished in the past. Two because it reminds me of a time in my life when I felt really good and felt like I could take on the whole world and the weight loss I needed to take on in order to be happy and healthy! And thirdly it reminds me of my friends who have loved and supported me no matter what. So every updated picture I take from now on will be done in this shirt! It's symbolical and it means a lot to me! I think I'll update everything weekly to track my progress I'll probably even put it in a blog on here. I want to fill up this blog with updates and exciting news as I make my way through this journey to give me something to look back on and also share my experiences with others. Boy this pictures were extremely eye opening to me I never realized that I looked like I am 20 months pregnant geez! But there is comfort in knowing I'll never be this big again I just wont, I wont allow it or stand for it! But also I will never allow a number on a scale to define me either because I know who I am inside and out! Anyway I wish you all a blessed and wonderful weekend! I have a ton of school work to get done this week lots to do as I near the final week of classes for this term looking forward to a break!